Friday, August 10, 2007

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Feeling so fucked up these days. Really feeling that i'm getting cranky.
I haven't removed my wisdom tooth this evening! Actually it has been there for a damn long time, judging from the dirt attached on it. The major pain was not caused by the growing of the wisdom tooth, although the dentist insisted on saying that. I'm just wondering since it has been there for around 5 years w/o hurting me, then why the hell it suddenly jumped out of the hood and started the strike? Authorities wouldn't feel good when being challenged. The pain gotta be caused by those sleepless nights and the mental tension for the past week. Anyway I'm still gonna maintain low level of activities during the weekend. So I've cancelled the BBQ on Sunday, which is supposed to have me under the sun and the 35C hot temperature for around 4 hours in addition to a 4-hour-long ride on the train. It seems to be too heavy for someone who can not even enjoy a bite of the food after arrival. So just got myself out of it. Besides, I also got myself out of a drinking party with some Japanese colleagues. I'm just not interested in it at all! I believe there is no need to sugercoat my feeling on this kinda stuff. I can never really make friends with the Japanese, and then what can I get out of this so called drinking party? Getting drunk but not getting laid, and what's worse is that I still need to ride on the train. It sucks. That one reason keeping me from thinking about the possiblities of staying and working here. I just can't stand that I need to sugar-coat my feelings all the time. Again it sucks! And I just can't picture myself being one of those "Salarymen", wearing biz suits in damn hot and humid summer days, trying to release the pressure by getting drunk after work. And the 28C air con setting in office during summer days is something else that makes me feel really uncomfortable. I can't even focus on my work during the afternoons with 3 PCs surrounding me roaring out hot air 24/7. It all SUCKS!

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